But I didn’t do my intermediate (+1, +2) course, but I
started my computer courses in 2009, specializing in multimedia and animation. For
to do this Animation course my uncle he helped me a lot with finances. I use to
go everyday 60 K.M’s (round trip) for this course. During this animation course my Mom she had got affected by AIDS
virus. Before this AIDS came she was so much healthy and very strong. For me I
don’t know when she got AIDS. Before she dies two months ago all relatives came
to know about her sickness. We admitted her in the hospital for treatment. We
all are shocked to know how she got this virus and when she got.
We admitted her in the
hospital June/2010. In hospital she uses to take lot of medicine. She had
become very thin and skinny. When relatives came to know about my mother,
slowly they all left my mother. But her younger brother he helped us
financially to buy good medicine. Even though government giving also we have to
pay for them also. In that hospital facilities are not good. Once I took her to
toilet the full of rooms are blocked and the entire toilet came outside the
floor. In government hospital there is no good treatment.
I never stayed with her before in my life even
one month. But before her death I stayed with her almost 2 and half months. In
hospital there is no one to help to my mother. I use to take her toilet,
washing her dress and changing her dress etc.
In July month she had became
sick. Every day she needs to take lot of tablets. In hospital evening times she
will get high fever. I thought maybe she will die very fast. Again we took her
to our home in village. At home she is so happy. From that day onwards she
don’t want take anymore medicine. Day by day days are moving very fast and her
health also became too much sickness. While she passes through the urine she
couldn’t sense what was happening. She does everything in her dress itself.
Even if small drop of urine or toilet drops down on the ground, it smells bad.
At home we have one small
shed. It’s made by bamboo shoot. In that home at least two people can stay and
sleep. I’m the one son for my mother. My father also passed away when I was 4
years old. There is no good house for both me and my mother. Once I went my
mother’s elder brother home to bring one coat for my mother to sleep. As I
reached his home suddenly he got angry on me and then he said to me “if you and
your mother come to my place to touch anything here I will cut your legs and
kill you both”. I don’t’ know why he said to me like that. But he never helped
us in every area. Then I said to him “Sorry uncle, we will not come to your
place. I just need one coat for my mother to sleep in that small shed”.
During July month in our
village more rains started to come. Our shed was one side leaning down .We was
staying in that shed in the end of the village. In that shed we don’t have any
power system. The full of place became more sticky mud and full of green grass
with rains. In our village we were suffering with electric problems. In our
shed we don’t have even one light and fan for both of us me and my mother. We
have only one small oil lamp. One day my mother younger brother he had given to
me some money to use. Then I went inside the village to buy one current wire. I
brought that one and then I fixed power from the main electric line to our
house. Only then we had electric line for the light and fan. For that one we no
need to pay the bill to anyone. It’s just like an illegal electric connection.
Once electric connection people came and they saw these things, they said they
will report police case on us. Somehow we managed them they were fine with us.
Because of the condition there we have finance problem and poverty. I don’t
have any option to fix the electric problem that’s why we were together staying
in that shed.
When my mother was at home
with this sickness no one came to see her. Her younger brother use to come and
visit us and help us. For me it’s very hard to stay in one place long time.
When she was on the bed I’m so young and like to play games with my friends.
But I just left everything and stayed all the time with my mother. Whenever I
see her face I use to cry for some while.
In July month again we took
her to the hospital for check up, but there is no improvement in her health.
Then later someone suggested us about one government organization for AIDS
people. There they will provide food and shelter for AIDS people. She has
mother, father, brothers and sister but she was staying like an orphan in that
organization. I don’t know exactly why they never visited my mom. During that
time I was doing my computer course. So morning I will go for class and from
12:00pm to until next morning I will stay with her in organization. In that organization
all the people they have to buy all things for themselves. There is nobody to
help to anyone but some of them they have their relatives with them.
In that organization every
week we have to take them to the hospital for check-up. Once I took my mother
for check-up that time I forgot our ration card to take them to show. I left my
mother in hospital and I went to organization to bring our ration card by the
time that hospital people left my mother outside. When I came back from the
organization I saw her she was sleeping on the floor. Suddenly from my eyes
tears came down. Because of one ration card they didn’t check my mother, then
later from the hospital I took my mother back again to my home. Because I don’t
want her to be anymore orphan.
Finally in the month of
august we were staying together in our small shed. People from the village the
organization from ASHA they came to see my mother and give some medicine to my
mother. In august month we had lot of rains in our village and our shed was about
to fall down. But we both use to adjust in that shed. It’s very hard to sleep
for 2 people, because the shed is very small. During August month she was very
sick, she couldn’t walk, eat, and drink. But sometimes I use to force her to
drink some fruit juice. In her body there is no strength to do anything.
In August month she started
fearing so much. We were sleeping in that shed and no one is with us. I use to
expect to someone to come and help us, but there is no one like that. One night
my mother not at all sleeping and fearing so much. She used to call me “Ratna!
Please come and help me. Here lots of snakes biting me please come and help me”
like this she uses to scream and call me. I also use to fear about darkness and
snakes but somehow I will go and check, but nothing was there. Sometimes when
she was calling I use to get angry but I will go and check. I know nothing is
there but she will call me because of fear of snakes and darkness. My mother
she is not saved by God and no salvation in her life.
There are lot of things
happened within this two months. She became very sick and about to die. In this
two months lot of change in my life too. We together we did lot of journey and
she had lot of medicine and injections. In my life I never had spent time with
her not even one month while she was health but I stayed with her almost two
and half months when she became very sick and final stage.
Finally August 14th night I
will never forget it in my life. It’s like for me ending day in my life. Every
day night as usual she use to call me and scream that night also she calls my
name. But she wants to sleep on the ground. I’m alone I can’t move her that
midnight. She moved herself and slept on the ground floor. That’s the only last
sleeping night. I thought she was sleeping very well. Early morning 15th/
Sunday/2010, 5:15am I woke up and went to one of my friend home to go outside.
There I spoke just five minutes with one of my grandmother. I said to her “why
God is not taking away my mother life and why he making her suffer like this” I
spoke what was in my heart and then after 10 minutes I came back to see my
mother and she was lying down already dead.
That time I don’t know what
I have to do. But I started calling my mother “mom! Wake up please”. But she
already died and she is not alive anymore in this world. I called some people
but they didn’t come. After sometime all relatives started to come to see my
mother. No one spoke to me and I also didn’t talk to them. By the evening
burial service completed. I thought that day is my last day for my life in this
world. I don’t know what’s going on in my life. Because both my parents are
dead so what is next in my life. I totally felt my life empty and lonely at
that time. That day night we had one
memorial service and prayer meeting in that shed place.
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